Friday, December 29, 2006

Just received this message as a forward...dont know if Jim Morrison really wrote this...nonetheless, it reflects my thoughts at the, here it is...

Friends can help each other. A true friend is someone who lets you have total freedom to be yourself-and especially to feel. Or, not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at the moment is fine with them. That's what real love amounts to-letting a person be what he really is.

I think the highest and lowest points are the important ones. Anything else is between. I want the freedom to try everything.

The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are. You trade in your reality for a role. You trade in your sense for an act. You give up your ability to feel, and in exchange, put on a mask. There can't be any large-scale revolution until there's a personal revolution, on and individual level. It's got to happen inside first. You can take away a man's political freedom and you won't hurt him- unless you take away his freedom to feel. That can destroy him. That kind of freedom can't be granted. Nobody can win it for you.

That's what real love amounts to- letting a person be what he really is. Most people love you for who you pretend to be. To keep their love, you keep pretending- performing. You get to love your pretence. It's true, we're locked in an image, an act- and the sad thing is, people get so used to their image; they grow attached to their masks. They love their chains. They forget all about who they really are. And if you try to remind them, they hate you for it, they feel like you're trying to steal their most precious possession.

People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that's bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they're afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they're wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It's all in how you carry it. That's what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you're letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.


Jim Morrison

Monday, September 11, 2006

One of my closest friends, Winnie had written this piece long long time ago...I think all of us identify with it, at some point or the our oh! so fast and all too busy lives...
We all need a little time
To introspect, to hope
To lay on rugs in futile slumber
Counting illusions...
Time to think,
and ponder
and criminal thoughts,
and meandering,
Delusions of penance...
Time to rejoice,
and enjoyLove,
and beautiful life,
Looking at utopia,
just out of reach...
Time to bereave,
Lost friends,
forgotten passions
Housed in unforgettable memory
Drowned in intangible grief...
Time to console,
Make a child smile,
just for a moment
Feel the good vibes,
Rejoicing in his happiness...
We all need a little time,
Sometimes also a little love...

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Random Mumblings....

I sometimes wish I could delegate someone to just take decisions for me.

On an average day, there are soooooo many decisions to be made...whether to go to the gym or not? whether to go nicely dressed to work or to just put on some shirt and black pants and tag along the damn black blazer? whether to get ready quickly and walk to office or hop on to a bus? or to laze around and take a rick?

And then there are other really horrid ones that keep haunting....and never let you be!!!

whether to do what you always dreamt about or to do something that you know you'll be good at?

whether to do something that you're interested in or to do something that you're trained to do?

whether to study further or to stay back and excel in the big bad real world?

whether to pick a fight or to just let things be?

whether to say that you're hurting or to just cry for a while and forget it?

whether to be the way you are or to be the way someone you care for wants you to be?

whether to splurge and party now or to save for the rainy days?

whether to plan each day or to let time and 'Destiny' take its own course?

The list is neverending...addendums are a sure thing for this post!
Lead, kindly Light, amid th'encircling gloom;
Lead thou me on!
The night is dark, and I am far from home;
Lead thou me on! Keep thou my feet;
I do not ask to see
The distant scene--one step enough for me.
[Hymns, 1985, no. 97]

Thursday, February 16, 2006

I hope you dance...
Its amazing how you find something that you really want (or sometimes need), just when(and where) you least expect it. It has happened to me many a times...
In law school, the boys hostel LAN always had, much as I hate to admit it, the better collection of music and movies (classics and otherwise!). We did manage to get some songs from the net and some more imported from the few generous boys. I could boast of possessing the best speakers in the hostel and a reasonably good collection of music...ranging from Indian classical instrumental to Bryan Adams....and some of Floyd's genre....and ofcourse, the old yet mushy and melodious hindi songs.....but something was always missing....
One morning, after class, I chose to surf the net (read chat with Ron) over my afternoon siesta...I had heard Shravya talk about some reallllllllly good song on the not so happening LAN...and how she thought that it was fanastic...she probably used all the flowery adjectives that she could, to praise the song....Knowing her, i didnt think i would really like the song that much, if at all...

Nonetheless,I found this song on the shared folder of this particular woman I could'nt stand (for various reasons), and for a matter of fact, still cant!
I loved the song...the lyrics of the song...the way it sounds....blah blah much so that I printed the song and pasted it on my otherwise neat and clean wall, just above the comp, so i could read it anytime i wanted!! I was so thrilled that I even went and thanked that woman for sharing that song!!!
It still cheers me up....this song was originally sung by a lady called Lee Ann Womack, and recently sung again by Ronan titled 'I hope you dance'.
I hope you Dance
I hope you never lose your sense of wonder,
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger,
May you never take one single breath for granted,
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed,
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you’ll give faith a fighting chance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

I hope you dance....I hope you dance.

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance,
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin’ might mean takin’ chances but they’re worth takin’,
Lovin’ might be a mistake but it’s worth makin’,
Don’t let some hell bent heart leave you bitter,
When you come close to sellin’ out reconsider,
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along,
Tell me who wants to look back on their years
and wonder where those years have gone.)

I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,
Promise me that you’ll give faith a fighting chance,
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

Dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance.
I hope you dance....I hope you dance..
(time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along
Tell me who wants to look back on their years
and wonder where those years have gone)

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Oh! So Cute!!!
Was generally reading the NYTimes this morning...and somehow happened to bump into some link somewhere that lead me to one of most read articles in January 2006 that reads 'Cuteness is distinct from beauty, researchers say, emphasizing rounded over sculptured, soft over refined, clumsy over quick. Beauty attracts admiration and demands a pedestal; cuteness attracts affection and demands a lap. Beauty is rare and brutal, despoiled by a single pimple. Cuteness is commonplace and generous, content on occasion to cosegregate with homeliness.'

Havent we all heard, if not used the term 'cute' being used to describe just about anything, from a cute lil earthworm to the new neighbour's oh, so cute! dog to the Prince of Bollywood, the cutest of them all, Abhishek Bacchan!!

I remember clearly, during my XIIth Std exams, my friends Ketul, Pritesh and I used to study together . Some form of joint studies it was, more fun than studies. On one such occasion, we were in Ketul's house and his domestic help was being exceptionally nice and bringing in constant supply of goodies for the 'hardworking' children. So much so, that I said "he is soooooooo cute!!Isnt he?" And that was it, I was brutually 'killllleed' by the two evil 'friends' who heard me say that.....and guess what, the next day, my entire class knew about me latest 'cute' crush!! Worse still, those two evil 'friends' still pull my leg over this!!:(

Being the first batch in Law school, we had a reasonably good rapport with the non-teaching staff, the mess workers and the other support staff as well. In our third year in Law school, we shifted to our new campus, and as it happens in most hurriedly finished buildings, many a things were left unfinished in the hostels. It so happened that many rooms, including my room did not have curtain rods. Since my room was one of the few rooms that were visible from the boys hostel, curtains were an absolute necessity. The Hostel Welfare Committee (yeah! even we had one of those!) member was tired of pursuing the electrician cum odd job man, Uttam 'da' to get the rods fixed. Once, my friend Saloni and I were walking back from class, and we met Uttam 'da' on the way. I told him, 'Please, aake mere kamre ka curtain rod fix kar dijiye!' and smiled my usual way. (For those who dont know me...I m one of those who keeps smiling, all the time! so, keep those stupid grins at bay!!! grrrrrrrrrrr!!!!). He smiled and said, 'Pakka! abhi aake karta hoon!' I liked the way he smiled (esp coz he had two cute dimples!). Saloni, being the B***** that she is, maaroed a smart one and said, "Dont tell me, Hetal! You find him cute??" I said, "yes, kind of!". She was totally disgusted, and chose not to respond! And guess what, Uttam 'da' came to my room and fixed the curtain rods within barely fifteen minutes! You dont even want to know what Saloni did to me after that!! The entire floor knew about this....and by tea time, the boys, too knew!!

Its not over the fourth year, we used to have joint classes for 'clinical education' where they would teach, or atleast try to teach 93 of us drafting of documents etc. What we mastered, in the end was probably, how to read newspaper in the front row, or how to sleep with your eyes open, or how to ask the most useless questions and take the class to a different plane altogether(I promise, ill dedicate an entry soley to clinic classes!!). Coming back, on one such day, we didnt have enough chairs in the class room, and as usual, I had walked in 5 minutes after the class started! Understandibly, there were no vacant chairs for me. Our man, Uttam 'da' was called and asked to fetch chairs for the ten odd latecomers. I was standing in one corner of the class, far far away from the prof, where I usually sat, and slept during the clinic class. Uttam da came with a chair, and like a 'knight in shining armour' walked strainght upto me, and gave me the chair! and needless to say, the entire class, led by Ms. Saloni had a hearty laugh!! So much for the 'cute' dimples!!

They say that one must learn from one's mistakes, I surely dont seem to follow that....coz a somewhat similar instance happened a few days ago. Law firms, in general have a very strong hierarchy in place. One does only what one isto do, nothing, absolutely NOTHING else.

In our office, though we have a vending machine for coffee and tea, the 'decorum' requires us to call the 'boy' and ask him to deliver it to our seat. One such day, the 'boy' gave me my usual coffee and water. In a little less than fifteen minutes, he came and asked me again, 'Madam ji, kam cheeni wali coffee/chai pilaao kya?" (Should I get you some more tea/coffee with less sugar?) I could'nt help but smile, and say 'how cute!'. Much to my dismay, my colleagues, who are otherwise engrossed in their own world, heard me say that....and since then, I have had it!

Mebbe it is time I learnt to use the word a little more judiciously!!